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To get different outcomes ask different questions

November 27, 2022 Melanie Hawken

by Laura Camacho

If you want a different outcome, ask a different question. That’s how real change happens. It’s also an easy way to start a more interesting conversation or bring up a delicate topic.

Asking good quality questions is probably the communication tool with the highest return on investment ever. By kick-starting a conversation with a good question, you position yourself as a leader and shape the relationship building with your audience, or conversation partner.

If you need to hold someone accountable, or correct a situation that feels awkward, start by asking the other person her point of view on that situation. It’s almost like getting the other person to show you his cards in that you first learn the other person’s point of view. That paves the way for you to adjust your recommendation accordingly. You also learn something about why things didn’t go as expected.

Unusual questions allow you to connect with people more deeply, and skip some of the  trivial chit chat at the next networking event.

Don’t say, So what do you do?

Rather, ask the following when you meet someone you like.

So, what are you excited about these days? Or maybe, What really interests you about your work?

Or even, What have you been learning lately?

Strong leaders use questions to shape how their teammates approach problems. Instead of telling employees the answer, they ask, How would you handle this? They then shed a customized perspective on the report’s developing thought process.

Leaders can also ask their direct reports, What can I do differently to help you be more successful?

Some questions help obtain performance feedback without waiting for the official review. For example, ask the boss, What can I do differently to be more successful? This question reveals you as a person open to feedback and eager to learn.

Our brains are more engaged when we answer questions. What do you think?


Laura Camacho, MBA, PhD, PMP, is an executive coach, trainer and speaker who opened Mixonian Institute in 2009 to rid the world of boring business communication. She has created innovative training programs for local and international companies, related to leadership effectiveness, excellent feedback, growth mindset and emotional intelligence. Multilingual, Dr. Camacho’s career highlights include facilitating The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (in Spanish,) being editor of the leading management newsletter in Venezuela. For 10 years she taught communication classes at ECU and College of Charleston. www.mixonian.com

 

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